Not Goodbye
by The Dark Shark
Summary: [Oneshot][AU] “This is not goodbye, Susannah. It’s not goodbye –” We had overcome every obstacle...except his parents' approval.


I have no idea where this came from. It's kinda pointless…

But just a scenario if Jesse's parents are alive and they don't approve of Suze. Not a happy story, this.

Oh yeah. All disclaimed to the one and only Meg Cabot.

Tell me what you think.

* * *

I should have known that it was too good to be true. Something so good, so strong like our love…it was too much to ask for it to be perfect. 

I should have known what they had planned when they called me over to the kitchen.

And for them to have said this when he was in another room, when they know he couldn't interfere.

"Susannah, please do not take this the wrong way. You're a very nice young lady, but we are not sure if you're right for our son. That is…we prefer him to be with someone with the same background, the same upbringing as him."

Awkward looks. Numbed feelings. Sliced heart.

"But I love him. Isn't that enough?" It should be. Please tell me it is.

More awkward looks.

"You're young. You have time to…be in love with someone else. This is not the end, Susannah."

Easy for you to say. You know _nothing_ of what I felt.

I pleaded with them. I begged them. But they had made up their mind. Nothing I could say could change their mind. Especially his father.

He heard us. "_Padre_!"

Opened kitchen door. Running blindly out of the house. Angry voices, one of which belonged to the man I love. No, not love. _Loved_.

A call to my name. Footsteps behind me. Hand on my arm.

"_Querida_, please. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. They shouldn't have said that." He was angry. He stood up for me. And that was more than I can bear.

Pulled into his arms. I pushed him away.

"Jesse, they're right. It hurts, but they're right. I'm not good enough for you." Hold back the tears, Suze.

"No! They are not right! They don't know anything!" Heated Spanish words. None of which I understand. I wanted to laugh out loud. He said they're not right, yet here he was, _doing _the very thing that made them right.

"Maybe I should have taken some Spanish language lessons first, huh?" And I did laugh, but without humour.

Dark eyes stared. I looked away.

"I'll talk to them. I'll tell them that you're the one I love. That it doesn't matter that your – your _background_ is different from mine. They'll have to understand."

A shake of the head. Mine.

"No. We've told them. I've told them. Love means nothing to them. Did you hear what they said? They said I could love another person. As long as it's not you."

We have fought doubters, distance, differences, and still it wasn't enough.

"We can still be together, Susannah. They don't have to know." Pleading in his voice.

"Please, Jesse." His grip on my hands was firm. "Let me go."

I wanted to fight them, to rebel against them. Show them that we are meant to be together. But I had no energy left to fight anymore.

"I won't let you go. I don't care what they say."

"You would go against your father because of me?"

"Yes, I would." No hesitation.

Disbelief was written all over my face. Something pleasant was creeping back into my heart, knowing that I was _that_ important to him.

And yet, something tells me he probably said that in the heat of the moment. But in the long run…it was pointless.

"Where can it go, Jesse? If we see each other behind their backs…for how long? They won't approve of our marriage. So what's the point of having a relationship if it leads to nowhere?"

I could feel a tear slowly rolling down my left cheek. And I couldn't wipe it away, because he was holding my hands.

"Susannah…" A hand went up to my face and cleared the trail of the lone tear. It was all I could do not to lean against his strong, warm hand.

Just whispers. My voice seemed swept away by the wind. "I wouldn't want to be in a relationship that's not approved by your parents. Or even mine. It's…it's not _honest_."

When did_ I_ turn into the old-fashioned one?

Around the time he turned into the rebellious one, I think.

"But…I don't understand…no, this is not…Susannah, I can't be with anyone else but you."

Damn it. There were tears in his eyes. Look away, Suze. Be detached.

"Jesse, I can't either. But what else is there to do? We're not meant to be. I'm sorry. More than I can say."

"Susannah…please. I will talk to them. Don't give up. This is unlike you."

Another tear escaped my left eye.

"I'm not giving up. I'm giving _in_. They just want the best for their only son. I understand that."

"If they want the best for me then they'll let me be with whoever I want!" He was angry again.

I pulled my hands from his grip. "Jesse, I have to go." They were looking from the window.

I hope they're happy. I'm giving back your son, here, take him. Match him up with some _senorita_ who can speak Spanish and cook great Spanish cooking.

"When can I see you again?" Now he sounded uncertain, fearful.

Sighing desperately, I forced myself to look into his eyes. Filled with sadness. And I hated them for making him sad. More than I hated them for making _me_ sad.

"We can't see each other again, Jesse. I…there's no point. The sooner we accept this, the better."

"_Querida_ –"

"Please don't make this harder on me." My voice was hard. I had to keep it that way, or I would have fallen apart. "Or on you."

My hands were free.

"This is not goodbye, Susannah. It's not goodbye –"

I turned and dashed towards my car, not looking back. Snatching open the car door, I jumped in and started the car. Speeding towards the junction, I made the mistake of looking in the rearview mirror.

He was still standing there. Just standing.

I turned the corner and sped along, keeping my eyes on the road. I saw a gas station nearby, and I pulled over to one of its parking space.

Stared at the graffiti-filled walls. I guess the gas station company didn't have enough money to repaint their buildings.

I burst into tears. He said it wasn't goodbye. He sounded so sure.

But he was wrong. It _was_ goodbye.

0-0-0 -

And I stand here, looking at him, knowing that it is the truth.

It's all Cee Cee's fault. I shouldn't have come to this function. Just that gut feeling I had.

His date was a beautiful Spanish woman. Dark hair, dark eyes, tanned skin. I have no date.

I should move from here. Go home. Walk away. Leave.

But I can't. I can't stop looking at them. Can't help but notice that his laughter doesn't reach his eyes. They're still sad.

I wonder if I'm like that. I hope not. It's been three months after all.

But when Cee Cee makes a joke about her boss and I laugh, I realize that my laugh doesn't reach my eyes too. How pathetic.

I shouldn't have laughed. Because he heard me. And now I see him looking at me.

Sad eyes meet. Room disappears. Pulse races.

I smile, to let him know that I am fine, even though I'm not. He doesn't smile back. My smile falters.

Oh no. He's walking towards me. Run, Suze. Run.

But I don't want to run. I want to feel his arms around me. I want to feel his fingers in my hair. I want to feel his lips on mine.

You said goodbye, a voice says. You two cannot be together.

But he said it's not goodbye, I say to the voice. He said it was not.

And when Jesse pulls me into his arms and kisses me with such want and _love_, I am tempted to believe him after all.

* * *

This story is continued in _Forbidden_. Thanks for reading!


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